Tuesday, July 2, 2013

Only the Lonely - I'm Not the Sporting Type

The question why Wiwill nor Alexander did anything to improve their health is equal to why I don't. To neither I know the answer. It probably has to do with breaking out of habits.

Today I did something I've never done before. I went to dragon boat training with the intention of climbing in that boat. I went home even before the training started. I hardly saw the boat.

I can't remember a training where I went reluctantly and returned feeling good about myself. What remember from the end of trainings of me being glad it was the end and I could go home. I never felt energetic. I never felt pleased. I only ever felt hungry and/or thirsty and an incredible rush to get out of the company of those people.

No, I'm not the sporting type. I never have been, I probably never will be. I am aware of my body, but it never really landed in the combination of my mind and my character with my body. To me, my looks only exist when I look in the mirror. Other than that, I have no idea of my body. I even vaguely forget what I look like when there's no mirror there.

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