Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Live 4 Love Leaves

This blog got a stupid title, but it pretty much sums up the themes in my life.

I do remember (vaguely) blogging something about my adoption. Apparently, today is the day to elaborate about it.

Read to understand a bit of my inspiration for this blog the blog below:
jasonmraz blog: four leaves left

I was adopted when I was 2 months old. I was one of the lucky ones to get offered an easier life with way more oppertunities. And since I was only a baby not understanding what it meant, nor understanding it was happening, it were my biological mother and my adoption parents who grabbed that chance for me. I'm glad they did, cause I would never have been where I am now if I had not been given that chance, nor when the chance was grabbed for me. Therefore, I can't be anything else than incredibly grateful, which I absolutely am. I'm aware of this luck of having the oppertunity to live the way I want, and I'm always grateful for that. Even when I'm moody and being annoyed by people without any sense of social awareness.

I grew up in a loving family. I grew up learning the value of love and respect and total commitment. I can't say anything else than that was what I got. I am even grateful for my dad's illness (he was a MS patient), even though it sucked. It tought me to be grateful for the things I have and for the things I am able of doing. Even as of today, all I need is a roof over my head and food. All other stuff is a bonus. I even never turn on the heating; I'll wear an extra sweater. I'll be fine.

When I was about 12 or something, I found a four-leaf clover. I think I lost, but I kept a substitute with the picture of my parents. Two young people in the frame of light let through by the window they were standing in. It's beautiful. And even though I lost the four-leaf clover, it's still with me in my mind. I remember the miracle of finding it. I wasn't even looking for one. I was walking over a field; I just finished working (picking blueberries). I was walking to my bike to drive home when I looked down and saw the four-leaf clover. I couldn't believe my eyes. The leaf didn't present the superstition of luck, it represented my luck. It reminded me of how lucky I had been already and that I didn't even really need an extra charm of luck. I was born with luck.

For a few months I have been thinking of getting me a tattoo to forever remind myself of all the luck I always seem to have. I already found some designs and I have images in my head of how I want it. I should just go for it.

Okay, so this piece seems a little going everywhere. It wasn't really inspiration to write, rather to remember and feel. Still, I wanted to let the world know how lucky I feel and how grateful I am for it.

I was also born a sunday child.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

The Elitists

In the past I accused people of elitist’s behavior. I saw the slaughter of new members (newbies or noobs or even more popular: n00bs), because they didn’t live up to unwritten rules of speech and behavior. Easily the older members attacked them for not knowing nor living by those unwritten rules. It seemed unfair to me, which is was, so I fought my battle for the ones who didn’t dare to speak up, or were too weak to defend themselves. These days belong to my past.

First I joined the Dutch equivalent of that community and later I even quite visiting the American (official) community. With that, a new era started.

Now, about 2 years since I joined the Dutch community and about 6 months since I left the American community, I realized something.

The Dutch community, young and innocent and still searching for its identity at the end of 2007 when the forum was born, grew into its own. As of today we count 400 members and a shitload (there goes the classy tone of this blog) of posts.

We had some falling outs, though never as hard and tough as the ones on the American community (watch me dodging the term ‘official’). Still, we are a group of people, members if you will, with our own book of unwritten rules. We do measure new members to these rules and we won’t cut you any slack. As a matter of fact, if you don’t get through the tests, you won’t ever be a real part of us.

I consciously described it as harsh as I did. We’re actually quite a nice group of people with not that tight of rules as the ones on RKOP. Fact is, not everyone will feel right at home. Fact is also that we defend our unwritten rules whenever we see fit. We’re everything a normal, real life, European community would be; kind and welcoming, but judging and kind of liberal.