So far, with any of my celebrity crushes, I was always hopelessly devoted to my crush (or crushes). The kind of love one feels, for someone you really don't know, is baffling. In fact, I'm only in love with the image, the character I created in my head who bears the same name as my celebrity crush. I am quick to note that anything I think and say about my idol is based on what I read, what I heard, what I experienced on a very superficial level and the way I put all that information together. The person I see as, for instance Jason Mraz, is not the actual person the way he developed, acts and is in real life. I am very aware of that.
It's a bit of a scary thing to say I'm totally and hopelessly devoted to an illusion. He's not completely an illusion; he lives for real, he puts music out for real and I've been to several of his concerts for real. What is an illusion are the specific characteristics I connect to him. He's probably got some of those characteristics, but some others he does not have. Overall, the complete collection of characteristics that I have in my head and labeled Jason Mraz is probably not the collection that define the real Jason Mraz.
Do I care? No, not really. You can't possibly know every little detail of one person; not even your own partner, or child. I am aware I probably know nothing about Jason Mraz, and the small things I think I know, might be very wrong, or changed, or whatever. It's not really the case of loving someone who's not close, who's far from being a personal friend or even knowing anything about that person. It's all about the love for the things he brings to the table of which I am (kind of) sure; his music. All I know is that when I listen his music, I am usually at ease and enjoying the words and melodies he put together and brings to my ears.
John Mayer once/often (select whatever applies) said he needed 30 minutes to bring people back to a place where they thought they knew nothing about him, before he could tell them who and what he really is. He is right; a lot of people, especially fans, claim they know their idol. They don't. Whatever they know are the superstitions in their heads and the rumours they read on Perez.com or ONTD. They might have guessed a few characterizations right, but only a few characterizations don't make a person (it would make a very boring person however). There's so much to have missed; it should keep us guessing.
So what's that relationship between an idol and his fan? What's more interesting; What's that relationship between a fan and her idol? (Note the subtle usage of he/she.)
It's in the melodies the idol brings, and also in the words. I can only really explain it with one of John Mayer new songs. Read the lyrics (and listen the song) and you'll know what I'm about. And with this, I take the liberty of assuming, you'll understand why this song caught my heart so bad and made me love John.
HALF OF MY HEART
I was born in the arms of imaginary friends
free to roam, made a home out of everywhere I've been
then you come crashing in, like the realest thing
trying my best to understand all that your love can bring
oh half of my heart's got a grip on the situation
half of my heart takes time
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that I can't keep loving you
oh, with half of my heart
I was made to believe I’d never love somebody else
I made a plan, stay the man who can only love himself
lonely was the song I sang, 'til the day you came
showing me a better way and all that my love can bring
oh half of my heart's got a grip on the situation
half of my heart takes time
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that I can't keep loving you
oh, with half of my heart
with half of my heart
your faith is strong
but I can only fall short for so long
time will hold, later on
you will hate that I never gave more to you than half of my heart
but I can't stop loving you
but I can't stop loving you
but I can't stop loving you with half of my...
half of my heart (2 times)
half of my heart's got a real good imagination
half of my heart's got you
half of my heart's got a right mind to tell you
that half of my heart won't do
half of my heart is a shock on a wedding to a bride with a paper ring
and half of my heart is the part of a man who's never really loved anything
half of my heart (6 times)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y_u7scUM9TM
No comments:
Post a Comment