I’ve been a fangirl since my 12th. The first and only time it really happened to me. I was just a kiddywink. It’s been so long ago; I can’t even remember how I came across Take That. Yes, I was a Take That fan.
I was obsessed. On Thursdays, after school, I would walk into the bookshop were they also sold papers and magazines. Every week I picked up the latest issues of several teen magazines, as long Take That was in it, which they always were. I collected all the interviews and put them together in some maps. I collected all the posters and redecorated my whole bedroom with them. There was nowhere a piece of original wallpaper to be seen. I nearly literally breathed, ate, drank and slept Take That. I could also shower in Take That, I had the shampoo, but that would have been a waste. I drove my mom up the Take That decorated walls. In 1996 it suddenly ended to my horror and grief. The boys had decided to quit. Looking back, I was losing interest at that point and the blow wasn’t as hard as I always pretended it was. Not even my mom realized that.
A period of quiet and piece came. I can remember lying on the couch listening to the Spice Girls wondering if they could be my next big thing. They weren’t and I was getting bored. It was then I realized I was addicted to fandom. Not the “belonging to a group”, but the means to escape reality for a bit. Luckily for me, mankind had been making popular music for quite a while and somewhere between 1996 and 1998 I invested all my energy into the Beatles. What I remember from that is my family making fun of me by saying things like: “No need to worry, she’ll keep the fanclub going!” I also remember frequent trips to the library to pick up everything about them I could find. I didn’t throw any of that out. I should make good of that new ladder I bought and take my Beatles stuff down.
Then 1998 happened and I went to college. It was the year of the very first Big Brother series and Dutch popular music. Watching Big Brother happened by default, because I was part of the Dutch flog, and listening to a lot of Dutch languaged music also happened by default, because it seemed that was all they were playing. I found a new love, Acda & de Munnik. A duo normally touring the Dutch theatres, but this time having a big hit. They were really good. They are still really good, but out of fashion and about 15 years older. WOW! It’s really been that long? After that came Queen, then Monty Python, then Kiefer Sutherland, then Jude Cole, and eventually John Mayer and Jason Mraz which brings us in the period 2005-2010.
The reason I just wrote this lengthy introduction to my reply to Becky is, I wanted to point out that it was easy for me to jump (not the shark, what the hell does Doctor Who have to do with sharks!?!?!?) ship. Even in my most faithful period I was not only listening to Take That, I was also listening to East 17, their enemies (you know press). I never restricted myself to just one artist or band or group, I always wanted to see the rest as well. Pretty much like me now wanting to also read Cantara’s book (thanks for the link) and checking out Stephen’s flaws for myself by maybe reading his blog since that is as close I’ll ever get to having a window into a Gyllenhaal world. For me it’s not hard to break the habit because they are many, but because they facilitate an ideal.
I find your (nearly) last sentence funny and ironic: “I think it’s easier to break the habit when it’s just one celeb.”
My biggest love in all my fandoms must be Queen, because it was with that band I did most of my growing up. Where I ocassionally listen to them or watch or read stuff about them, I pretty much let go; I hardly write about them. More John and Jason, because they’re more recent and my adventures were more exciting, but I have no clue what they’re doing right now. While you seem to have difficulty to let go of Jake. I must admit, he’s hot!
Summary: It’s missing a facilitator that binds me to fandom.
Now you might wonder why I can’t dream about the boy next door, for instance. The reason is those celebs are easy to avoid meeting to ever getting to know them. I can attribute the flaws, the once I can deal or work with. I can decide how they will develop (or not). I can’t with real people. They’re real, out of my control and it’s slightly embarrassing to fantasize about people I personally know.
Yesterday I started reading Cantara's book. I just finished the Babygate chapter.
No comments:
Post a Comment